I’m more “productive” with the MacBook
it’s here!
My new MacBook got delivered today! It’s pretty sweet. The little built in camera is nice and fun although I don’t know what all I’d really use it for, aside from taking ridiculous pics because no one else has an iSight. Zach and I took lots of ridiculous photos which will be on flickr soon. Oh it’s so much faster than old P.B… But what should I name it? It obviously can’t be PB Mc Apple the second. And M.B. sounds silly. Any suggestions are welcome.
Zach’s new blog makes me want to revamp mine really bad, cause the fact that I supposedly design things but can’t design my own blog is sort of sad. Also I’ve been checking out illustration based blogs lately ( Bearskinrug,Brando Blogo, Michael Cho, and of course Drawn) and thinking, “hey I should rant less and draw more.” or maybe rant just as much, but supplement it with more drawing. I don’t draw nearly as much as I would like to any more. I’d really just like to go to the zoo and draw some animals or something. Too much of my “makin stuff” time is spent in front of the screen. And I haven’t made any prints all quarter despite having purchased all the supplies in preperation for it.
I am incredibly not stressed out about anything right now. It’s so weird.
president’s weekend rambling
Taking a break from symbol making. I think I liked my symbols more when they were less symbol like. Oh well.
I really like my new job so far, of course things are always good at the begining and I haven’t really done a whole lot yet. But it’s looking promising, especially because the last couple of days that I’ve been there I was sad to leave at 5 cause I was still having fun making stuff and I wanted to keep working. I’m really excited cause it seems like only good things can come from the experience I’ll have from this place after I graduate. I’d really like to be able to stay in Seattle at a good firm or something cause the idea of leaving everything and everyone already here makes me sad, more so than when leaving St. Louis. Of course that’s over a year away, so I shouldn’t worry about it yet.
Friday was one of the student events put on by the AIGA where they had various local designers come and talk about what they look for, interviewing and portfolio and all that good stuff. It was pretty interesting hearing what they had to say about it all. It was also nice to hear people other than my profs talk about being “curious” about a lot of things.For the longest time I just considered it being fickle, and figured it was something I was suppose to get over as I got older.
But it turns out my insatiable desire to know a little about everything (aka “mastering” everything) can be put to good use, which is good news for me. I don’t know why this revelation is so exciting for me, maybe cause people have always told me “people who are a jack of all trades are a master of none.”
goodness!
goodness goodness!
Zach and I went to Wild Ginger for dinner last night, and it was fancy but more importantly, VERY TASTY. Oh how I love good food. The flour-less chocholate cake was yummy.
Doug actually liked my work the other day, which makes me happier than it really should. It’s always suprising when Doug says nice things.
And I totally got the HFS job I wanted so badly! I started today, and it was pretty cool. I’m really excited for it cause it seems like there will be lots of different things I get to work on. And I totally get my own little cubicle! This also makes me way happier than it should. Something about it makes me feel like playing pretend grown up at work, except I suppose I really am at work and I’m making stuff that’s less pretend than my classwork. I’m excited to fill it with my own crap, which is a pretty strange thing to look forward to I suppose, but whatever. And I get a huge monitor! SO WIDE! I hope I can make some non-sucky stuff there.
And I had tasty Indian food for dinner! And got groceries! SO HAPPY! Apparently my life is nothing but food and design.
On a side note, this idea of buying nothing but food, underwear, and medicine* seems like an interesting idea. I thought about maybe trying it out, if only for maybe a month at first. But maybe after I get this cd off amazon first.
*Actually they can get as much stuff from like thrift stores and craigs list, just as long as it’s not new.
Riley’s cat
Riley’s cat, aka Sneaky Kitty has been messing with me all weekend. He use to be afraid of my wrath and stayed out of my room. But now he lets himself in whenever he pleases and when I give him an evil look he’s just like “I’m a teenage rebel! You can’t keep me out anymore! You know you want to pet me.”
an open letter
I know I focus on individual events in my life, but at that moment they’re important to me. Maybe in the whole scheme of things they’re relatively small events, but they are not inconsequential to me. The things I experience make up my reality.
Maybe you don’t see how these individual events could be related or important because you have an incomplete idea of what’s going on in the rest of my life, and you’re unable to see things from my perspective. Of course this is understandable since you live on the other side of the country, and I haven’t actually talked to you for months (for a reason).
All the individual events make my life interesting and worth sticking around for. I’m not exactly sure what this “bigger picture” is suppose to be. I’m not particularly interested in focusing on some ambiguous big end result. I’m interested in the process, the steps that take me there. If I forget about individual events I risk forgetting anything I could have learned from that experience. Or I risk glossing over details and getting some romanticized residual memory that doesn’t do me any good later.
I write things down because I know I that otherwise I will forget them. Writing down the little details makes it possible for me to better organize them (and the many other related events you never see) and understand them in retrospect. Looking over these litte things together make it easier for me to interpret and understand new experiences. Some people just do this all in their head I guess, but I can’t. In my head everything just goes in circles.
Maybe I over analyze things, but I think it’s better than not thinking about them at all. I’d rather be overly aware and analyze events than be mindless and pretend that nothing matters and details are trivial, because they’re not.
I don’t mind personal critiques, usually they help me notice something or improve and I appreciate them. You can tell me what you think about me or my personal choices or whatever. But if you imply that my experiences not worth talking or even thinking about, it just makes me feel like everything I care about is inconsequential. And thats just not cool, especially since you’ve done it more than once.
So this got long and rambly because I thought about something too much, but I don’t care because I had to get it out there.
nonverbal issues
So, I had my HFS interview today. My very first portfolio based job interview. I was so nervous going in and even afterwards. I felt like I went through my stuff too fast and/or didn’t bring enough to show. And I was terrible at explaining the projects & concepts. Even on my Genetics book covers, which really are based on a pretty solid concept. I had a reason for all of it. But when they asked, I came up with some crap.
And afterwards they asked me all these other questions, and I felt like I couldn’t come up with good answers fast enough. I really hadn’t anticipated their questions before going in, I had no idea what it would be like.
And there were like 3 people interviewing me, which is just nervousness x3. And The Designer at the interview was really hard to read, because he seemed so serious most of the time. The marketing women were friendly, as marketing people generally are. So! I’m glad its over. I don’t hear till Friday. I really want the job, but even if I don’t get it the interview was a good learning experience.
Later in the day, in Symbols, we met with Karen individually to talk about our projects and get a midterm evaluation. She had some pretty positive things to say about my work and how I was doing in the class.
But at the end she said she thought I wasn’t very happy, and seemed kind of grumpy in class, and I could be more positive, and I’m not very smiley, but maybe that’s an Asian thing.* I didn’t really know what to say to that. The first thing I thought was “Oh my god, I’ve become [a certain negative person I know].”
I’m use to teachers telling me to talk more, but I don’t think they’ve ever told me I seemed grumpy. It’s weird cause I don’t think I’m unhappy in class. In fact, I rather enjoy Symbols. Maybe my habitual restlessness and tiredness and stress come off that way though. I know I’m bad at pretending to be happy.
But I couldn’t stop thinking about it after she said it to me. Do other people think I’m always unhappy? Is this what makes me unapproachable? Do people avoid me because they think I’m unfriendly? Have I gone too far trying to not be That Sterotypical Loud Bubbly Asian Girl? Please let me know.
I think I need to learn to relax. I let things stress me out way too easily. I also need to learn how to communicate competently.
*Karen cites her parents as being very “composed.” My parents use to intimidate my friends. The Designer at the interview also happened to be Asian. I don’t know why it would matter at all though.
more name madness
So, for about 15 years (I don’t think I knew my last name before I was 5) when people ask me how to say my last name I’ve broken it down into the thing my mom told me to tell my friends: v-d-cha-learn. Although when she tells anyone she usually says v-d-CHA CHA CHA!-learn, cause it’s more fun this way. But this isn’t really how it’s pronounced in Thai. It’s pretty close, but it’s not quite right.
But as I was sitting here sketching poster designs when I had a revelation! I figured out something even better than Venereal Disease Cha Cha Learning:
“We teach ya learn”
Except you have to sort of slur it together and put the break between teach, like so: Wetea,chyalearn. So simple! and so much closer to the actual pronounciation. I felt like such a genious I had to share it.
Great Gerbils
While walking home today I decided my gerbals needed more impressive and regal full names. Sam & Max are good short names, but I feel bad they don’t have full propper names. So from now on their full names are Samuel L. Jackson, and Magnus Maximus, respectively.
the future!
I am always thinking about the future. Planning and worrying and getting excited about things that don’t exist yet and neglecting the tasks I have at hand. I wish I wasn’t so future oriented. it probably has to do with the fact that I’m such an idealist & romantic. The future is full of possibility, the past is stagnant and done. And The Now is okay, except for the fact that half the time I’m thinking to myself “I should be designing right now,” which is sort of annoying. We went to see Of Montreal a few days ago which was fun but the whole time my design stuff was constantly nagging me.
I have an interview on Monday for a job I REALLY REALLY REALLY want. I’ve been worried about it since this past Monday. I worry because I want it so bad I’m afraid I’m setting myself up to be let down. I worry because I know one of the other candidates for the job, another girl in my design class. I wish I didn’t know who I was running against. I don’t know why it really matters, aside from it feeling a little awkward because I don’t think I’m very competetive naturally. I worry because I often freak out and become a bumbling idiot.
I am worried about my Sustainable Oceans communication programs. None of it is anywhere near where I want it to be. I’m glad Doug has faith in my idea, I just don’t know how to get it together. I’m pretty behind.
On the other hand I’m really into making my Spa symbols. This is probably my favorite of Karen’s classes that I’ve had so far. I think I like it because it’s all drawing and there’s no typography involved at all, which just makes it even more evident I should draw instead of design.
I feel like none of my other (non-design) friends worry about school stuff as much as me. Maybe they do but just don’t rant about it like I do. I dunno. I think it’s the fact that I feel like what I do in class has a direct connection to what I’ll do when I graduate. I need to have finished projects that can speak for me for at least a few years.
Also, because I’m a dork and like to look for new classes way in advance (registration is Feb. 21), I’ve gone through and found some options. 2 design classes are a given, but I get to pick at least one more… the ( )s are credits.
MUSIC 446/AES 446 Music in American Cultures (3)
DANCE 101 Introduction to Dance (5)
CLAS 430 Greek and Roman Mythology (3/5)
C LIT 330 The European Fairy Tale (5)
L ARCH 322 Introduction to Planting Design (3)
I would REALLY like to take the Music/American Ethnic Studies class, although at the 400 level I’m not too sure about it. The Landscape Architecture seems kinda silly, but maybe useful eventually. And I think Dance would just be really interesting. I’m not a real dancer by any means, but I think it’d be fun to dance for credit.
I really like that despite having 2 required classes a quarter I can still get all sorts of other random stuff. One of my goals in college is to take one class in as many different departments as possible. Art is a little different cause I have lots in this department, but they’ve all been very different.
Wow, that got long.. I should be designing.
